Author: Shirley Sorbello
Return to Cape May
Sunset at the Point
Summer would not be complete without my annual trip to Cape May. Actually, I usually travel there the last week of spring to avoid some of the craziness of the crowds that later flock to the Cape May area. My favorite part of Cape May is Cape May Point which is a mile or so outside of the quaint Victorian town. This is the area where the Atlantic Ocean meets the Delaware Bay. It is primarily a residential community with only one store/restaurant, a post office and many churches.
Catholic Church, Cape May Point
Last week, my daughter and I stayed at a cottage on Lake Lily, a thirteen-acre, fresh water lake with a colorful history. Apparently it was a special watering hole for the Kechemeche Indians. Rumors of British soldiers and Captain Kidd are intertwined in its history. Recent efforts by the Friends of Lake Lily have kept it a peaceful, healthy retreat for both humans and wildlife. I spent many relaxing moments sitting on this bench. I have to say that as much as I love sitting by the ocean, I found it more peaceful here.
View from Cottage
Swans on Lily Lake
Lake Lily
Here are some of my photos at the point including the remnants of the S.S. Atlantus, the concrete ship that sunk off the coast in 1926. For some reason, I feel compelled to take one of the wreckage each year even though it doesn’t change very much.
S.S. Atlantus
At Cape May Point
At Cape May Point
Cape May Point
At Cape May Point
This area has a few excellent wineries which are fun to visit when the weather is not ideal. We spent an hour or so relaxing at nearby Willow Creek Winery.
Willow Creek Winery
At Willow Creek Winery
Recently, I discovered that my great-great grandparents retired to Cape May Point back in the 1870s after a life on the farm in Burlington County. Unfortunately, the 1880 census does not give the street address. One of the fun things we did was to eat in a French New Orleans restaurant at 410 Bank Street in the town of Cape May, a house where their grandson, and my first cousin 2x removed, lived in 1920. Maybe this family connection partially explains why I’m drawn here again and again.
410 Bank Street
So how about you? Do you have any fun summer plans?
Photo Friday – Virginia Beach Sunrise
The view of a sunrise from my hotel window in Virginia Beach, VA in November, 2015. So peaceful, isn’t it?
In Celebration of Introverts
It’s time for introverts to stop feeling like they should be more like them…extroverts, that is. It seems like there are many more of them than us, or at least it did when I was growing up. I was encouraged to be more outgoing, speak up and, “for heaven’s sake, raise your hand more in class.” Research is now showing that there are differences in brain chemistry and in the way these so-called personalities respond to stimuli and recharge energy. Extroverts are energized by being around others while introverts thrive when they are alone or spending limited time with a close friend. Too many people, loud noise or constant activity drains their energy. However, there is no such thing as a one-hundred percent introvert or extrovert; the majority of people fall somewhere in between.
Introverts, give yourself permission to be you—the deep thinker, the intellectual, the writer, the poet, the artist or silent creator who looks at the world from a place deep inside yourself. If you are happy in your world, don’t allow others’ expectations to be forced upon you. They may perceive your quiet tendencies as uncaring, rude or stuck-up. That’s their stuff, not yours (unless you really are). The only reason that some people may call you out is because of their own emotional response to you. They worry that you are judging, or thinking badly of them, and that makes them feel uncomfortable.
Parents and educators, teach your children, introverts or otherwise, to love and accept themselves as they are. A little person who is made to feel “less than” will waste years trying to measure up. Sadly, some go on feeling defensive about themselves their whole lives. Those who learn to appreciate themselves as children are more likely to embrace their full potential as adults if they build upon a solid foundation that celebrates their special talents and uniqueness.
Introversion has graced us with many brilliant and talented people, i.e. Bill Gates, Abraham Lincoln, Eleanor Roosevelt, Albert Einstein and even, Christina Aguilera. It’s okay to be quiet—some of us need our silence and thrive within it. Don’t make us try to fit into a mold. That’s the quickest way to destroy our spirit.
For more information :
http://www.medicaldaily.com/brain-introvert-compared-extrovert-are-they-really-different-299064
https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201008/revenge-the-introvert
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-power-of-introverts/
http://introvertspring.com/blog/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/08/15/famous-introverts_n_3733400.html
The Connection
1708 was a notable year for Maria Elizabeth Lucas, who was in her late teens or early twenties at the time. A terrible freeze lasting for four months destroyed the vineyards and trees in the Palatinate region of Europe. People and animals froze to death in this land already devastated by war. News came from England that free passage was being offered to persons wanting to go to America, and thousands of hopeful families fled there. Among them were Maria, her parents, Francois and Madeleine, and her six younger siblings.
Upon arrival in England, the family was devastated to learn that this rumor was untrue. They became stranded in London in a filthy refugee tent camp, struggling to keep from starving to death. Disease was rampant, and Maria’s mother as well as one of her younger sisters died during the year or so they lived at the camp.
Finally, they were able to secure passage to New York City in 1710 and settled in New Rochelle, a colony founded by French Huguenots in the late 1600s. There Maria met a fellow immigrant named Harmon Richman, a blacksmith, whom she married in 1712. They soon moved to Monmouth County, New Jersey and later settled in Salem County, also in New Jersey, where they purchased land and raised eleven children. They attended the Swedesboro Lutheran Church which is about 5 miles from where I live today.
Old Swedes Church, now known as Trinity Church. The original log church was built on this site. This church was built in 1784.
Her eldest son, Jacob, married Catherina Mattson, a descendent of the Swedes who settled in this area in the 1640s. After Harmon died, Maria lived with Jacob, my fifth great-grandfather, and Catherina in a house which Jacob built in Monroeville in 1746. The house is still standing today, and I recently drove by the location where I saw a part of the modernized version from a distance and later grabbed a photo from Google maps.
From there I drove to Daretown to the Pilesgrove (now Pittsgrove) Presbyterian Church where Maria attended services with her son and his family. Walking through this cemetery in its incredible peacefulness, I was delighted to find her weathered tombstone and that of Jacob’s which was slightly behind hers and barely discernible. I reached out and touched them both. It was when I held my hand on the top of Maria’s for several seconds that tears came into my eyes and I felt a powerful connection to a woman I am proud to call my sixth great-grandmother.
Old Pittsgrove Presbyterian Church. Photo by Tim Elmer
Mary Elizabeth Lucas Richman died December 2, 1767
I often feel connections to some of my ancestors that I learn about through my genealogy studies. Some I discover little about, but with others like Maria I am able to piece together significant portions of a life. More importantly, in the rare instances when I can walk the same streets as an ancestor did even over 250 years ago, the connection becomes undeniable.
Reference: http://gsscnj.org/upload/files/Ancestors’%20Attic/AA_Lucas_%26_Richman_Family_07-29-2010.pdf
Photo of Jacob Richman house taken over 100 years ago found on Ancestry.com and credited to Bonny Beth Elwell, author of “Upper Pittsgrove, Elmer and Pittsgrove.”
Top photo credit: Copyright: https://www.123rf.com/stock-photo/family_tree.html
In the Silence
I’ve been quiet for a while as far as blogging or any type of writing goes. While I have been dedicating some of my time to genealogy and home improvement projects, as well as life in general, there have been serious moments of reflection about my writing.
Rebecca, the protagonist from my first two short stories, “That’s Just the Way It Is” and “Return to Texas” has become very vocal (to me, at least) about the fact that her story is not complete and asked me to please allow her to finish it. All too ready to put aside the novel I’ve been working on for a few years, probably because I know it needs the dreaded major revision, I have agreed.
The new short story will be called, “Last Breath.” Parts of it are written, and I am in the process of doing the cover. Although I dislike boxing myself in, I will say that it should be available by May. While writing this story, I am doing more historical research about the time period of this piece (1884-1891 in Texas) and the impact it has on the storyline.
In addition, I have decided to do a novelette where I will be expanding these three stories, and including some historical influences especially the Civil War. Much more will be revealed about Rebecca’s early life in Philadelphia before she and her parents moved to Texas right before the War. At this point, I haven’t decided whether this additional project will be completed before or after my novel.
While it’s nice to see your words in print, it must be even nicer to hold them in your hands, which aside from the noise from Becky, is motivating me to put these stories into a “real” book. Perhaps I could even stretch it out to a novella. I’ll probably let her decide.
I welcome any comments or ideas, especially from those of you who have read my first two stories. For my fellow writers, how’s your writing life going? What’s new? What’s flowing, or not? It’s time to make a little noise on this blog!
Photo credit: copyright: <a href=’http://www.123rf.com/profile_fintastique’>fintastique / 123RF Stock Photo
Desiderata
Forty years ago, when I moved into my first apartment, I came across a beautiful plaque and purchased it for my new home. The wise words written upon it resonated with me from the moment I read them. Back in the 70s, the author was unknown, but it was later discovered to be Max Ehrmann, an American, who had originally published this piece in 1927.
I hope you enjoy reading, or re-reading them if you’ve come across this before.
Happy New Year! May 2016 be one of your best!
Desiderata ( in Latin, “desired things”)
“Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.’
Max Ehrmann
A Fall Escape
Last week, I was back on the road for a trip to Virginia—one last getaway before winter sets in.
On the way, I stopped in Maryland on a lovely, warm day to visit fellow blogger, Robin, who was kind enough to invite me to her home for lunch. We talked as if we had know each other for years; it’s nice to discover that real friendships can develop over the internet.
Walking through the woods with Robin.
My destination was Virginia Beach, VA where I attended a three-day conference, “Life Beyond Death,” at Edgar Casey’s Association for Research and Enlightenment. Two of the psychic speakers, Lisa Williams and John J. Oliver, were especially awesome.
Association for Research and Enlightenment
When I arrived at the hotel, this lovely view of a rainbow, or two, welcomed me. I grabbed this photo with my cell phone as I hadn’t brought my camera to the room.
Virginia Beach, VA
Next morning, this was the view of the sunrise from my hotel window. The weather turned rainy and cooler after this.
Sunrise on Virginia Beach
The day I left, I stopped by Chincoteague Island, VA to see the wild ponies. None seemed to be on the beach.
Chincoteague Island
Finally, I found some at quite a distance (my camera was zoomed to the max), maybe half a mile away.
Ponies on Chincoteague Island.
At the end of my journey, I stopped by Rehoboth Beach in Delaware on a very blustery day.
Rehoboth Beach
I find that it’s always good to get away, but just as nice to return home with an updated perspective on life. I leave you with the words of Lin Yutang ~ “No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes home and rests his head on his old, familiar pillow.”
Growing Older – Forgiveness
The older I get, the less emotional baggage I want to carry with me, so at this point in life I have learned to pick my battles carefully and let go of those I no longer want to own. I have realized that some “injustices” need to be released because holding on to them is simply doing me harm, physically and emotionally. I value my own well-being more. It also helps me to remember that forgiveness does not mean that you have to forget.
In addition, my slowly-acquired awareness that the “injustice” says more about the perpetrator than about me, has allowed me to move on. Do I really want to “sink” to their level? Neither am I so quick now to “perceive” an injustice and attribute intention to another. I don’t really know what is going on in their head…perhaps it’s just my perception and they never intended it the way I took it.
I trust in my belief that God (the universe) is ultimately fair so why would I waste my time plotting some type of revenge? It will be dealt with in its own time and place. I am happier to live peacefully by focusing on the positives in life.
Photo credit: Copyright: <a href=’http://www.123rf.com/profile_sean824′>sean824/123RF Stock Photo
A Common Man
No royal blood coursed though his veins; nonetheless, he led a notable life. Arent Issacszen van Hoeck was the progenitor of the Van Hook family in the United States. Born in Hooksiel, Germany, he immigrated to Amsterdam in the 1640s where he became a Dutch citizen. In 1655, at the age of thirty-three, he traveled with his second wife, Geertje, to New Amsterdam (New York City) where fewer than 1000 people lived at the time.
Arent was a cordwainer, which was a shoemaker who produced footwear of fine, soft leather. He was not a wealthy man and from the records of court documents, he often seemed to be in financial difficulty. Perhaps it was his five wives and ten children that strained his prosperity. Six of his children lived into adulthood including Judge Lawrence (Laurens) van Hoeck who was my 7th great-grandfather. He appeared to have been a staunch member of the Dutch Reformed (Calvinist) Church with three of his marriages taking place there as well as several baptisms of his children. Arent died around 1697 when he was seventy-four, a ripe age for the times.
I am fascinated by stores of people who came to our shores in the 1600s. It had to take much strength of spirit and faith to make the eight-week trip from Europe to a barely-civilized world where Indian attacks were prevalent. There is no indication as to what inspired Arent to immigrate, but no doubt there were expectations of a better life in this new land. We will never know if his dreams were fulfilled, but we do know that a long, full life was lived by this “common” man.
For anyone interested in the van Hoeck family, there are several references at Ancestry.com . The photo is courtesy of http://www.nuevaamsterdam.com/eng/?pg=new_amsterdam. No copyright violation intended.